I have MS : But it hasn't got me

Michaela shares her experience of being diagnosed with MS. Life for Michaela before her diagnosis was full of energy and independence. We hear how Michaela copes with her MS by recognising that she is more than her MS.  

Before MS became part of my life, everything felt easy. I was busy living- travelling the world and working as a flight attendant without a worry in the world. For 16 years, my job wasn’t just what I did, it was who I was. I had energy, freedom, and a real lust for life, with no reason to believe my body would ever let me down. 

Looking back, the signs were there. I had experienced tingling and numbness in my right leg, but like many, I brushed it off. I remember so clearly a moment when my little toe on my right foot went completely numb, but as it was a cold month and the ground was frozen too, I assumed it was just the cold. But, the feeling never stopped. Instead, the ‘frozen’ sensation crept up my leg. 

I Googled my symptoms, and went to my GP, and was told it was likely a trapped nerve. It wasn’t until I then had three further episodes of similar symptoms that the process of diagnosis really began. 

Things moved quickly. I was told I had a textbook case of MS. I had previously experienced numbness, optic neuritis, the MS hug and had visible lesions on MRI scans. I went through blood tests and standard neurological examinations. Within just three months, I went from no diagnosis to being told I had MS. 

I was diagnosed in the neurology department at the Walton Centre, Liverpool by a neurologist who was about to leave the country. There was no handover, no continuity of care. Despite this, when I was told I had MS, I felt relief. At least I had an answer.

There were moments along the way that were deeply confusing and, at times, damaging. When the numbness spread to my arm and hand, my GP still insisted it was a trapped nerve. Then came the comment that stayed with me the longest — a neurologist told me I would be in a wheelchair within a year.

Fourteen years later, I walk unaided. I do use a walking stick when fatigue hits — a deliberately chosen, leopard-print designer one — but that prediction never became my reality.

The biggest challenge was losing the life I had and learning how to adapt to the life I now live. 

I can no longer work as a flight attendant, which meant letting go of an identity I had held for 16 years. That loss was huge. Today, I still work for my airline, managing crew welfare, absence, and conduct. It’s different, but it keeps me connected to the world I love.

MS has changed how I live, but it hasn’t taken away who I am. I’m more protective of my time and energy now. I prioritise the people and things that truly matter. I plan my holidays and activities around rest just as carefully as the activities themselves. 
 

So does my love for nice clothes and accessories — which now includes the leopard-print walking stick for tougher days.

I still want to go to new places and try new things, even when I know they won’t be easy. I remind myself I am more than my MS through the challenges I overcome and the life I continue to build.
 

Yes, I have moments of frustration and jealousy — wishing I could walk better or wear heels without thinking twice. I allow myself those feelings for five minutes, then I let them go. I focus instead on what I can do to improve, whether that’s intensive rehab or simply choosing the best dress I can find.

To anyone newly diagnosed: everyone’s MS is different. Do what works for you, and don’t let anyone bully you into decisions you’re not ready for.

What I hope people take away from my story is this: my lust for life hasn’t changed. My impatience with people wasting theirs hasn’t either. 
 

• Optic neuritis - Learn more about this eye condition associated with MS.
• MRI short description of content
• MS Hug - Learn more about this common symptom of MS.